Speaking SL

After long time I’ve started writing my blog again. I had no internet access and even if I had the access to the internet it was only from work (during my break time). Now I’ve got the internet at my new place, however I have trouble with the connection. So I’ve decided to write this from one of my friends’ place.

16th of May 2006, I went to a discussion forum in University of Melbourne. It was called “Speaking Sri Lanka – conflicts and the history behind the conflict” and it was organized by few Tamils and Sinhalese people.

Two Tamils and two Sinhalese people were giving speech about what they have experienced and what is their understanding about the conflict and the history. Speech was started by Murali Mageswaran and he was saying what he went thru when he was growing up in Lanka. He was mainly talking about what happened during 1983 riots ect. It was good to see for the first time (as far as I know) someone stood up in public and telling them openly what the Tamil people went thru and going thru.

Then Vithura was giving speech about his experience and his understanding of the conflict. If you heard of SPUR, he’s SPUR president’s son. He said that he was born here and has been raised here and he was saying he never thought about who he is until someone asked him to give a speech ‘today’ who’s he as in if he’s Sri Lankan Aussie or Aussie Lankan or Lankan or Aussie… and his parents relocated from Lanka by their own choice. He was saying that every time he went to Sri Lanka he couldn’t travel everywhere freely even though it’s his mother land and Tamil’s complaining that they have been discriminated by Sinhalese government, Injustice felt by all in Lanka not just by Tamils. I had almost 10 questions to ask Vithura, but I was just quietly noting them down with frustration because we were not allowed to ask any questions until the last person finish his speech. At one point I felt sorry for Vithura because how much he knew about our struggle and his understanding of the struggle and conflict and I was also offended by his speech. But if he doesn’t know anything he shouldn’t have been there in the first place to give a public speech about “Speaking Sri Lanka” when he doesn’t even know what is really going on there.

Kumaran was the third person to give the speech and he was mainly talking about 1983 riot and how they have escaped and survived and finally came here. Kumaran wasn’t really talking about what Tamil people going thru but, he was talking about what he has experienced in 1983 and he was anti war.

Then speech was given by Mr.Perera, he was saying that LTTE is a terrorist organization and how they fall under the definition of terrorism. That’s what he was trying to prove and that’s what he was talking for about 10 minutes.
I wanted to ask them 100s of questions, but I had chance for only one question; Vithura was saying that he never asked him the question about his nationality or who he is. I was laughing to myself and thinking I asked myself that question when I was about 7 years old, because of what I/we gone thru… I asked my parents, why Army bombing in Tamils’ area and why all our brethren got to suffer and die. Since then I have realized I’m not Sri Lankan, I’m Tamil…. I have realized I’m Tamil not Sri Lankan when army arrested me for no reason, they just arrested me just because I’m Tamil, they just forced me to sign documents which was not true just because I’m Tamil (I got arrested when I was 17 years old). Since they only had time for one more question… I asked Vithura, how he can say that Injustice felt by all, not just by Tamil? He realized what he said and he apologized for saying that, he agreed that Tamils not treated fairly, I was really surprised to see that. I don’t know if he really knows what the government doing to the Tamils. I told him and the people what happened to me when I was growing up in Lanka…

After we finished that discussion forum I was heading to the train station with few of my mates, we were sort of happy in a way that people get to hear our side of story in public (may be the first time in Australian society) and we were discussing about what is going to happen. One of my friend was saying that if we get Tamil Eelam, LTTE’s going to go thru mental trauma, because of the military fights, I didn’t agree to that first, because if you have the right reason for you doing something, you don’t have to sit down and worry about things. But, my friends were telling me about Vietnam war and what the American and the Vietnam soldiers went thru, but American went there to prove their power and they didn’t have any other reason, but for us, its our right and survival. My friends were arguing that when the war is over, LTTE will have nothing to do and they will go thru mental stress. I didn’t agree, I was telling them during the peace talk time, what they were doing in Vanni or the Tigers controlled area… they were planning and rebuilding our Tamil nation… If you went to Vanni, you know what I’m talking about. So after we get Tamil Eelam we all going to be busy rebuilding our nation rather than sitting down and worrying about how we got the land and how many sacrifices that we had to make. I was thinking instead of we go thru mental trauma we will be so damn proud of what we have achieved and what we have done. Because… Tamils are one of the oldest race in the world and they lived/ living/ live everywhere around the world but Tamils don’t have a land for themselves, so we should be bloody proud of what we have achieved or what we will be achieving.

And my friends were discussing about war against war is not the right thing/ answer. I don’t agree, I asked them one question. If I come and hit you or try to kill you what would you do? My friend was saying that ‘I will defend myself but I will not kill you’. I told him you can’t just block when I try to kill you, you have to hit me at one point, and otherwise you will only become weaker and get killed. I told them because you all grown up hear, until you face it in reality you won’t know what you will do. Our freedom struggle didn’t start just yesterday. We were having our freedom fights in democratic/ ahimsa way until early 70s (about 28 years) and only after early 70s we had to take weapons to protect ourselves.